I remember when we had to put our cat Scruffy to sleep about 10 years ago, when she reached 21 years old and the pain of old age got too bad. It's the kindest way, but it never feels right. That was the only time I ever saw my father cry.
You can tell just by those pictures he was a great dog.
I keep a copy of two books, "Dog Heaven" and "Cat Heaven," in my Pastor's Study at the church. Whenever someone's pet dies, I give them the book and run out and by another copy ASAP. They're fantastic and if you can get your hands on "Dog Heaven" it'll be worth the 15 bucks or so.
We just went through that on Friday with our three-legged cat Gizmo. He was fourteen. You handled it exactly right. Keep an eye on the pet, he will let you know when it's time to go.
We had gotten the diagnosis (metastasized cancer) a week earlier. We talked about it that Friday, and I thought my wife had resigned herself to it and was handling it pretty well, but at one point, with Giz in her lap, she broke into racking sobs. Giz got up, hopped onto the ottoman, turned, and looked at her. It's easy to read into things, but what he was communicating was so real. He was upset that Donna was sad, and he stared into her eyes for minutes, the expression on his face seemingly saying, "Don't be sad, it's ok, I'll be alright."
I've had many incredible moments with my cats over the years, but this is one I will always remember.
My first (recent) communication with you involved a pretty stark disagreement, but this is what makes us human. God bless.
Dean I am sorry too, and I know what you went through. My cat Penny who was 19 years old died a few months ago. Your story has brough a few memories and tears.
She didn't suffer long, about a 4 or 5 days, and she didn't seem to be in terrible pain. I wanted to take her and have her put down, but I just couldn't do it. I suppose I was hoping she would get better, but knowing in the back of my mind she was too old, and wouldn't, or maybe I was just a coward. For long periods of time I would sit beside her and talk to her. My dog Lady stayed near her a lot too.
She would eat if I hand fed her, but wouldn't get up. The last day she wouldn't eat, or try to get up anymore, so I didn't try to force her. Instead I determind I would find the courage to take her the next morning and have her put down.
The next morning my dog woke me up. At first I though she wanted me to let her out for potty, but she took me to Penny and nudged her a few times, but she had died during the night.
I bawled for maybe an hour, then burried her in my large back yard by the back fence at the end of a row of English Heather. Lady didn't make a fuss until I started to fill the dirt in, then she trid to stop me. Then for a couple weeks I had to keep and eye on Lady, because I was afraid she would dig her up. She didn't, but she went to the spot every time I let her out for over a week.
I'm so sorry about Buttons. My own dog is very old and has also been having health problems. She's 12 (almost 13) years old, and she's a Chow/Golden Retriever mix, so she's very old for a dog her size. I just took her to the vet a couple of days ago because her arthritis has worsened considerably. He put her on some stronger medication, and she seems to be doing a little better for now.
The vet told me that her health will continue to go downhill. I know Coco is not going to be with me much longer, and it really makes me sad.
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I've always been a dog lover (we have a sweet, fat Golden Retriever named Lucy right now). We had a dog pass away from a stroke a few years ago, a Lab/Golden mix named Sophie, and I miss her still. She was my son's guardian and playmate when he was younger, too, like Buttons and Jake. Losing a member of the family (which is what pets are) is so hard, but it seems to me you handled this as well as it could have been.
I've already gone through about four cats' lifetimes. They come, they go. You get used to it. (Never had any dogs. Can't stand them anyway, so nothing lost.)
If you're too sentimental to accustom yourself to mortality in the family, just keep pet rocks. They don't get sick. They don't howl or meow in the middle of the night. They don't piss all over any carpets.
We lost our cat, Smokey a couple years ago. It's a similar story to yours and what others have written. It's amazing how much a part of our lives our pets become and how much it hurts when they are gone.
So very sorry. I've been there several times now. It's important that you were there with him, as hard as that is. One thing I tell myself is that the more the love the more the pain. It's the flip side of the joyous times and we can avoid it by not loving. That's not the way for me. Now I better get my cat, give her a hug, and sniffle a little bit for you, and Buttons, and Jake.
Our last one made it to 13-1/2 before internal problems caught up to him. Understood things I didn't, and didn't know he did until later. Long may he run.
Yeah, I know how you feel, Dean. I've lost four dogs over my life. Mort had to be put down, old age took it's toll on his senses and he became so confused we had to put him down. Rascal died in surgery while getting fixed. Pugsley, Rascal's son, got hit by a car. Arny died from wounds inflicted when our now ex-neigbhor's akitas(big fighting dogs) got loose. All were good dogs, and each one was important to the family. It's never fun to lose them.
You did the right thing, preparing Jake before it happened. My mother took pictures with me and my cat Smokey, then the next day took him to be put to sleep. I was an adult at the time, and handled it like an adult, but I still wish I had known.
Pets occupy a very special place in our hearts, and its nice that you're not only able to part with Buttons on such bittersweet terms, but you have many wonderful memories of him to keep with you. And thanks for sharing a few of them with us.
A few weeks ago we found out that my dog has arthritis. We got him some pills and stuff, which seem to help. But before that he looked like he had been shot. It was very very tough to watch. I am already dreading the day that I'll have to go through what you did.
I'm so sorry, Dean. Your family is in our prayers. We've had a few family animals go the same way in the last few years and it never gets any easier. When I was growing up, the only time I ever saw my father cry was when our dog Runzel had to be put to sleep. Doggies are tough-minded creatures with an amazing capacity for loyalty, and for trying so hard to please even when they're deathly ill.
I wonder if genetic engineering will someday give us pets that live as long as we do. And if that would be an entirely good thing.
Words are so hollow, but I want to let you know I'm sorry for your loss. From everything you and Rosemary posted, I can tell he was a great dog. You have my deepest condolences and sympathy.
I love dogs and tear up every time I see this. So sorry to see the sad news.
Cancer seems to have become remarkably common in dogs. I was going to say big dogs, but my friend's poodle/terrier mix had breast cancer a couple years ago, which was successfully treated.
One of my favorite dogs ever, my stepsister's first golden retriever, named Jake, who always reminded me of a golden mix I got when I was 13, named Apollo, died a couple years ago of cancer of pretty much everything. It was like wildfire. Kashmir, a golden my father and stepmother had, who had been mother of the national breed champion at one time before she retired and went to live with them, had a disease that humans get too. It's more common and more fatal in dogs, and I forget what it's called. IIRC it was cancer that got Brandy, my father's golden, and Peter, another of my stepsister's goldens. I am sure I have heard of others recently, same thing, cancer. Odd. I never heard of dog cancer when I was younger. Maybe we keep them so healthy they get cancer when they're old enough, just as we tend to do. Or maybe it's a conspiracy! Sorry.
I am so bad about losing dogs, I am not sure I could ever have one again, much as I would love to when I have a house.
You are such a good soul, Dean. You did absolutely the right thing at every step both with Jake and with Buttons.
As anybody could tell from my site, I'm a dog person. In fact I'm proud to be a member of a dog pack. I don't know if there are souls. But I do know this: if dogs don't have souls, then neither do we. And I don't know if there's a heaven. But I do know that if there is a heaven and dogs don't go there, I want to go whereever it is that they went.
I'll give my dogs an extra now. You do the same with all your loved ones.
"I wonder if genetic engineering will someday give us pets that live as long as we do. And if that would be an entirely good thing."
Ask a parrot owner. If well treated, parrots (and I think other large birds as well) can easily outlive their owners. My sister-in-law has one, and it has its own mortality burden: who takes care of your pet when you pass away? Of course, this is a question we all could face, depending on what trucks we walk out in front of; but for parrot owners, it's strongly likely. That makes the birds more problematic than children, because children will eventually grow up and become self sufficient (most of them, anyway). A parrot has to be passed on to the next generation, which means you have to decide who of your kids or young friends is both able and willing.
I swear.. we had to do this same thing exactly the same time 2 years ago with the dog I'd had since I was 15. I'm really sorry for your family. I know it's tough. ((HUGS))
Like, Jay, I'm hesitant about getting a dog or a cat for this very reason. Like most others, I grew up with several pets of both persuasions and it hurt when they died of natural causes or had to be put down; like losing one of my siblings.
Give Jake a hug for me and you and Rosemary (plus the smallest Esmay) hug each other for me.
I put Maggie (labrador retriever) down a year ago next week. Advanced liver cancer. She was a happy dog, though, right up to the day her kidneys failed, shortly after her 13th birthday. Rest in peace, Girl.
One of the scariest moments of my life was when my favorite dog, MacGyver (I was eight, okay?) got out of the backyard and followed me on my way to the store - I didn't see him until the breaks squealed and I saw him get hit by a car. He was a damn big mutt - he looked like he had german shepherd, collie, and husky in his lineage (among other things) - and I must have been about twelve at the time - I grabbed him and ran home - about half a mile. Turned out he was just a bit dazed, and only suffered a slight limp that he walked off in a day or two.
Five years later, we were forced to move to an apartment and MacGyver had to stay at my uncle's. After about six months, his stomach started to bloat and he lost his appetite - the quack of a vet prescribed antibiotics and said to come back in a week if it persisted. MacGyver died two days later.
He was a great dog who was never mean - unless there was some uppity rottweiler at the park - the rotts always ran away yelping. He was the only animal I ever truly liked, and I miss him a great deal.
I'm sure Buttons was one of those great dogs as well. Again, my sincerest condolences.
I remember when we had to put our cat Scruffy to sleep about 10 years ago, when she reached 21 years old and the pain of old age got too bad. It's the kindest way, but it never feels right. That was the only time I ever saw my father cry.
Rest in peace, Buttons.
I keep a copy of two books, "Dog Heaven" and "Cat Heaven," in my Pastor's Study at the church. Whenever someone's pet dies, I give them the book and run out and by another copy ASAP. They're fantastic and if you can get your hands on "Dog Heaven" it'll be worth the 15 bucks or so.
Dog Heaven
Rylant is fantastic. I'd buy it for you myself but I'm saving up for more surgery.
We just went through that on Friday with our three-legged cat Gizmo. He was fourteen. You handled it exactly right. Keep an eye on the pet, he will let you know when it's time to go.
We had gotten the diagnosis (metastasized cancer) a week earlier. We talked about it that Friday, and I thought my wife had resigned herself to it and was handling it pretty well, but at one point, with Giz in her lap, she broke into racking sobs. Giz got up, hopped onto the ottoman, turned, and looked at her. It's easy to read into things, but what he was communicating was so real. He was upset that Donna was sad, and he stared into her eyes for minutes, the expression on his face seemingly saying, "Don't be sad, it's ok, I'll be alright."
I've had many incredible moments with my cats over the years, but this is one I will always remember.
My first (recent) communication with you involved a pretty stark disagreement, but this is what makes us human. God bless.
She didn't suffer long, about a 4 or 5 days, and she didn't seem to be in terrible pain. I wanted to take her and have her put down, but I just couldn't do it. I suppose I was hoping she would get better, but knowing in the back of my mind she was too old, and wouldn't, or maybe I was just a coward. For long periods of time I would sit beside her and talk to her. My dog Lady stayed near her a lot too.
She would eat if I hand fed her, but wouldn't get up. The last day she wouldn't eat, or try to get up anymore, so I didn't try to force her. Instead I determind I would find the courage to take her the next morning and have her put down.
The next morning my dog woke me up. At first I though she wanted me to let her out for potty, but she took me to Penny and nudged her a few times, but she had died during the night.
I bawled for maybe an hour, then burried her in my large back yard by the back fence at the end of a row of English Heather. Lady didn't make a fuss until I started to fill the dirt in, then she trid to stop me. Then for a couple weeks I had to keep and eye on Lady, because I was afraid she would dig her up. She didn't, but she went to the spot every time I let her out for over a week.
http://www.indigo.org/rainbowbridge_ver2.html.
It didn't lift my spirits much, but it helped a little. Maybe it will help you, too.
Sorry.
I'm so sorry about Buttons. My own dog is very old and has also been having health problems. She's 12 (almost 13) years old, and she's a Chow/Golden Retriever mix, so she's very old for a dog her size. I just took her to the vet a couple of days ago because her arthritis has worsened considerably. He put her on some stronger medication, and she seems to be doing a little better for now.
The vet told me that her health will continue to go downhill. I know Coco is not going to be with me much longer, and it really makes me sad.
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I've always been a dog lover (we have a sweet, fat Golden Retriever named Lucy right now). We had a dog pass away from a stroke a few years ago, a Lab/Golden mix named Sophie, and I miss her still. She was my son's guardian and playmate when he was younger, too, like Buttons and Jake. Losing a member of the family (which is what pets are) is so hard, but it seems to me you handled this as well as it could have been.
I'm so sorry. :(
If you're too sentimental to accustom yourself to mortality in the family, just keep pet rocks. They don't get sick. They don't howl or meow in the middle of the night. They don't piss all over any carpets.
Arnold Harris
Mount Horeb WI
Sorry for your loss.
We lost our cat, Smokey a couple years ago. It's a similar story to yours and what others have written. It's amazing how much a part of our lives our pets become and how much it hurts when they are gone.
You have my condolances man.
Go give Jake a hug.
A sad story to read- but a very nice send off, Dean.
But now we have a crazy Greyhound. He's no replacement, but he's a valued member of the family in his own right.
Pets occupy a very special place in our hearts, and its nice that you're not only able to part with Buttons on such bittersweet terms, but you have many wonderful memories of him to keep with you. And thanks for sharing a few of them with us.
A few weeks ago we found out that my dog has arthritis. We got him some pills and stuff, which seem to help. But before that he looked like he had been shot. It was very very tough to watch. I am already dreading the day that I'll have to go through what you did.
R.I.P Buttons.
Words are inadequate, but they are all I have to offer.
I have had to do the same with a beloved pet, and it is never easy.
I wonder if genetic engineering will someday give us pets that live as long as we do. And if that would be an entirely good thing.
I lost a beloved dog many years ago, on December 1. This Wednesday was a rotten day for me, as December 1 always is.
Am keeping you folks in my prayers. And now you'll have to excuse me, it's hard to type and see the screen through a watering veil of tears.
Words are so hollow, but I want to let you know I'm sorry for your loss. From everything you and Rosemary posted, I can tell he was a great dog. You have my deepest condolences and sympathy.
Cancer seems to have become remarkably common in dogs. I was going to say big dogs, but my friend's poodle/terrier mix had breast cancer a couple years ago, which was successfully treated.
One of my favorite dogs ever, my stepsister's first golden retriever, named Jake, who always reminded me of a golden mix I got when I was 13, named Apollo, died a couple years ago of cancer of pretty much everything. It was like wildfire. Kashmir, a golden my father and stepmother had, who had been mother of the national breed champion at one time before she retired and went to live with them, had a disease that humans get too. It's more common and more fatal in dogs, and I forget what it's called. IIRC it was cancer that got Brandy, my father's golden, and Peter, another of my stepsister's goldens. I am sure I have heard of others recently, same thing, cancer. Odd. I never heard of dog cancer when I was younger. Maybe we keep them so healthy they get cancer when they're old enough, just as we tend to do. Or maybe it's a conspiracy! Sorry.
I am so bad about losing dogs, I am not sure I could ever have one again, much as I would love to when I have a house.
As anybody could tell from my site, I'm a dog person. In fact I'm proud to be a member of a dog pack. I don't know if there are souls. But I do know this: if dogs don't have souls, then neither do we. And I don't know if there's a heaven. But I do know that if there is a heaven and dogs don't go there, I want to go whereever it is that they went.
I'll give my dogs an extra now. You do the same with all your loved ones.
"I wonder if genetic engineering will someday give us pets that live as long as we do. And if that would be an entirely good thing."
Ask a parrot owner. If well treated, parrots (and I think other large birds as well) can easily outlive their owners. My sister-in-law has one, and it has its own mortality burden: who takes care of your pet when you pass away? Of course, this is a question we all could face, depending on what trucks we walk out in front of; but for parrot owners, it's strongly likely. That makes the birds more problematic than children, because children will eventually grow up and become self sufficient (most of them, anyway). A parrot has to be passed on to the next generation, which means you have to decide who of your kids or young friends is both able and willing.
Give Jake a hug for me and you and Rosemary (plus the smallest Esmay) hug each other for me.
I put Maggie (labrador retriever) down a year ago next week. Advanced liver cancer. She was a happy dog, though, right up to the day her kidneys failed, shortly after her 13th birthday. Rest in peace, Girl.
Best to you, Dean. Remember the good times.
Mark Shaw
Sorry to hear the news, Dean.
One of the scariest moments of my life was when my favorite dog, MacGyver (I was eight, okay?) got out of the backyard and followed me on my way to the store - I didn't see him until the breaks squealed and I saw him get hit by a car. He was a damn big mutt - he looked like he had german shepherd, collie, and husky in his lineage (among other things) - and I must have been about twelve at the time - I grabbed him and ran home - about half a mile. Turned out he was just a bit dazed, and only suffered a slight limp that he walked off in a day or two.
Five years later, we were forced to move to an apartment and MacGyver had to stay at my uncle's. After about six months, his stomach started to bloat and he lost his appetite - the quack of a vet prescribed antibiotics and said to come back in a week if it persisted. MacGyver died two days later.
He was a great dog who was never mean - unless there was some uppity rottweiler at the park - the rotts always ran away yelping. He was the only animal I ever truly liked, and I miss him a great deal.
I'm sure Buttons was one of those great dogs as well. Again, my sincerest condolences.
Dean, you are a wonderful Dad. I am so glad you held my Jacob in your arms. I am so sorry for all of you.