Ben Kepple, wracked with pain, sweating from the stress, hands a bit aquiver, forces himself to say nice things about Britney Spears. After reading that, I rushed to his house only to find him unconscious at his keyboard. Fortunately, a quick trip to the Emergency Room, and a stab of adrenaline to his heart, brought him out of it. Rumor has it that his doctors will release him in time to finish watching coverage of the New Hampshire primary, which they agree should be far less stressful for him. He has been warned, however, to restrict himself to bland foods and to only monitor happy candidates like Howard Dean.

King of Fools, in the meantime, remains in denial about who's really in charge. I don't know what he's whining about, I'm content to allow him to keep his title and his minions, after all...