Erica asks an interesting question: Is there an equivalent male term for "spinster?"
So far as I know, "confirmed bachelor" really is the only equivalent. There are several reasons that I can think of (and, believe it or not, this is probably worth reading):
A "bachelor" is presumed to be a man who is not married, but is eligible and planning to marry someday. Until he's "confirmed," that is. Once he's confirmed, he will not marry. (Or so he says, anyway.)
Note that, on the flip side, there is no female equivalent of "woman who isn't married," except "single woman/girl." I guess we do have the term "bachelorette," but most people laugh at that term and don't use it, except at pre-wedding parties for women.
Speaking of which, an old-school term for a single girl would have been "maiden," which, also, is usually not used except in some wedding ceremonies. Hmm! But anyway, that's why we also have the term "old maid," which is the same thing as a "spinster." "Spinster" isn't considered as rude, but it usually implies a woman past marrying age who never plans to marry.
These days we tend to assume that a "confirmed bachelor" was probably another word for "homosexual man" in the old days. But I think that's a careless assumption. Back in the day, a "confirmed bachelor" may have been a rake, may even have been an angry cuckold, and not at all homosexual. So, although I would assume that many "confirmed bachelors" in the old days were in fact homosexual, we can't say that was always the case.
If you want to add some complication to this: a young single man who sowed a lot of wild oats with women was often called a "gay bachelor."
Here's more fun: another word for a man who never intended to marry used to be "misogynist." This was, in some circles, considered a polite term for a man who made it clear that he never intended to marry. Yes, he too may have been homosexual, although that wouldn't be a safe assumption--unless, perhaps, he had lots and lots of female friends, was very popular with the ladies, but wouldn't have sexual congress with any of them.
What does this all mean?
Well, it means that, a hundred years ago, a gay bachelor and confirmed misogynist might well chase after maidens, but probably not many spinsters, even though he loved the company of women.
Aren't words fun?
Sadly, the lack of fidelity in marriage today makes it even more complicated (over 60% of married people have affairs).
Those like Scott Peterson manage to be both married AND a bachelor. Is this a "married bachelor"? The one's who will never quit cheating should probably be called a "confirmed married bachelor."
Then, there's the "confirmed married GAY bachelor" -- or the "confirmed married BI bachelor" who enjoys the comforts of marriage and sleeps around with both men and women.
In places where gay marriage is legal, it will be even more complicated. And, we really do need similar descriptive terms for women.
Since modern women are now free to earn the status of baccalaureate, derived from "baccalaureatus" the medieval Latin term for "bachelor," perhaps there should be no gender distinction. An unmarried woman would simply be a bachelor -- just as many females in the acting profession prefer to be called "actor" rather than "actress."
Dean - In Georgia we call 'em "old maids in britches." I think that the term, when pronounced properly, is no kinder than "spinster".
As an aside, calling a man a "gay dog" (or a "gay deceiver") was a way of saying that a man is a rake with the ladies, in common usage until the late sixties. Even more delicious confusion from the beloved English language!
Kelley: How queer!
;-)
Show of hands:
How many people have never before seen the word, "cuckold?"
How many people have seen it before, but had to look it up this time?
I knew the word cuckhold because I had to look it up a couple of years ago.
Words can be marvellously good fun. I especially enjoy old novels where some gentle parlourmaid will be saying, "I don't rightly recall, actually, I was standing by the tea cart and all of a sudden I came over all queer."
It kills me every time.
D
I've heard the word cuckold but had to look it up. I'm satisified with the fact that currently there is no word for the male equivalent of "spinster" and I'm going to have to make one up myself.
I'd like to know what the proper way to pronounce "old maids in britches" is.
Jeez. I must be one of the best-read in this group. Not only have I known what "cuckold" means for years, I got it from context.
(That's what happens when the person who wrote what you're reading does a good job of explaining obscure words.)
Factoid:
On my parent's Scottish marriage license (issued forty years ago this month, BTW)my mother is referred to as Catherine Magee, spinster and my father as Thomas Fallon, journeyman.
50,000 geek points to anyone who can correctly identify the derivation of my father's identification as "journeyman".
Without looking: a journeyman is a craftsman who has evolved beyond apprenticeship, but is not yet considered a master of his craft. Could be a carpenter, a plumber, a welder, a blacksmith, or whatever.
Let me guess: your dad was a pipefitter?
Electrician.
And the 50,000-geek points go to you, sir.
There is a three-tier system in traditional trades. An apprentice is bound to a master to learn his craft. When he reaches a certain level of skill he is allowed to leave his original master and seek out a new master to study with. His ability to leave, or "journey", is the origin of the term. In some countries like ancien regime France this code was enforced by law. A craftsman caught on the roads without papers or “Carte” (read: union card) authorizing him to be away from his master was subject to imprisonment and possibly death at the discretion of his master.
In many municipalities one must hold master level certification to apply for a contractor's license or to pull a permit for a job.
Hmm, I wonder how this might play out in the IT industry? I shudder to think.
And here I thought I was just plain single.
Cuckold? What, you folks never read Shakespeare?
All right, so much for equivalents for "spinster;" how about an equivalent for "cuckold?"
Alannis?
;-)